The curator of Kindle Cover Disasters soils his search history to bring us a list of books that shouldn’t be left within ten square miles of a child.
1. K is for Knifeball by Avery Monsen and Jory John
Don’t do what Donny Don’t does.
2. The Boy with Dinosaur Hands by Al Carusone
This kid’s teens are going to be tough.
3. One Two Three Pull! by Sophie Schmid
I’m not eating that egg.
4. Bi-Curious George by Andrew Simonian
5. The Muffin Muncher by Stephen Cosgrove
Look at this guy. This guy f*cks.
6. Unicorns are Jerks by Theo Nicole Lorenz
I once refused the wishes of a pixie gangster and woke up next to a unicorn head. It was a terrible time, but this book really helped me get through it.
7. I’d Really Like to Eat a Child by Sylviane Bonnio
8. My Parents Open Carry by Brian Jeffs and Nathan Nephew
Be sure to check out the sequels, “Jet Fuel Can’t Melt Steel Beams!” and “Chemtrails Took My Job!”
9. The Very Hungry Cthulhupillar by Ben Mund
Yes it’s real, and yes it is glorious.
10. Puppets Go to Church by Wilma Powers Perry and Earl Perry
“It’s in Revelations, people!”
And finally, the winner of the “I Wish it Were Real” category…
If you enjoyed this selection, don’t forget to check out…
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